"If you keep do, do, doing, you'll wind up with doodoo!"
This was a subject that came up tonight, now I'll put it into context. We were sharing at a life recovery bible group some of the women started, and one shared that she wanted to become closer to God, get into His word, and really study. Her goal is to become "God-Like" (not in the sense that she's God), just close to God as she can get. I think it's awesome, and so did the other women. It's what God wants of us, to come closer to Him, to seek Him. Anyway, she shared that she felt like she was chasing Him, and that she wasn't feeling that "feeling", like a spiritual awakening, but stronger, I and the other women understood that feeling (hope you do to).
Another women (I call her P.) shared that early in her sobriety, and even for some time, she chased that feeling, she wanted 10 years of sobriety in one year. Her sponsor told her that never happens, we did years of drinking, we don't get better overnight. She (P.) went onto explain, that we have seasons (or time frames) in our life, a Spring (where we bloom), Summer (we're warm & fuzzy, having fun), Fall (we reflect & are thankful), and Winter (a dark period before new growth). We could go through all these seasons in a day, a week, a month or years, but we constantly do go through them.
But, we both came to the same conclusion. That if I'm to busy chasing, and running, and doing, and not slowing down, because I'm in to big of a hurry to get to that "feeling" or cram 10 years into 1 year, then I'm not enjoying the journey. The journey is what it's all about, not the destination. The journey gets me closer to God, the journey teaches me lessons. I feel joy, peace, serenity, sadness, pain, etc., but through the journey I get change, and closer to my "conscious contact with God".
WOOHOO! It was an awesome night! Thank you God, thank you ladies, you know who you are, you just have no idea how much you help me!
Blessings & Love,
Kimberly
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Spiritual Thursday!
I love Thursday, particularly, every other Thursday. Why? you ask, because a group of us girls in AA get together, and are working through a life recovery book.
This book takes examples from the Bible, and relates them to the 12 Steps of AA, the Serenity Prayer, and some other stuff I haven't even touched or looked at yet. It's not for everyone, but I enjoy it immensely, and glean things about myself, and what I think my H.P. is all about from the discussion. Plus, as a bonus I get to see these wonderful women from AA that I've come to rely on as part of my support group. (God knows how much I hated YOU women when I came into the program of AA, but that's a story for another day). I'm very excited and can't wait.
It's a little chilly here today, but I thank God for the last couple of days of warmth. I actually got to ride my Yamaha 125, before putting it away for winter. The rides were beautiful, all the leaves changing, the sunshine and robin's egg blue sky - aaahhh! sigh*** It will just make me appreciate the coming spring that much more.
I know this is short, but I've got things to do, I read this quote and absolutely loved it:
"If I ever get to heaven it will be from running away from hell" - Father Ed
Bless & Love,
Kimberly
This book takes examples from the Bible, and relates them to the 12 Steps of AA, the Serenity Prayer, and some other stuff I haven't even touched or looked at yet. It's not for everyone, but I enjoy it immensely, and glean things about myself, and what I think my H.P. is all about from the discussion. Plus, as a bonus I get to see these wonderful women from AA that I've come to rely on as part of my support group. (God knows how much I hated YOU women when I came into the program of AA, but that's a story for another day). I'm very excited and can't wait.
It's a little chilly here today, but I thank God for the last couple of days of warmth. I actually got to ride my Yamaha 125, before putting it away for winter. The rides were beautiful, all the leaves changing, the sunshine and robin's egg blue sky - aaahhh! sigh*** It will just make me appreciate the coming spring that much more.
I know this is short, but I've got things to do, I read this quote and absolutely loved it:
"If I ever get to heaven it will be from running away from hell" - Father Ed
Bless & Love,
Kimberly
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Good Morning!
I've been busy the last couple of days, which is a good thing. Today is going to be another busy one, but an exciting day. Today, I will do some work at home (I've already been bumping around the house this AM), then go shopping, then hit a meeting in the Akron area, and then I'm off to class. Woo Hoo! - I'm really excited about this class, it's a Life/Nude Figure Drawing class at one of the community art centers. It's been a while since I've taken a class like this, I may have even gotten one of my girlfriends interested in joining in the fun also, and it will be nice to flex these fingers and brain muscles. I'm even thinking about starting to do my photography seriously again. I used to love wandering, and just photographing things that catch my eye. People, places and things...at least today I can appreciate them.
Well, last night at my Big Book discussion we finished Chapter 4 - We Agnostics (starting at pg 54 to 57), and boy was it awesome! I remember being raised with religion in my life, and knowing good from bad, but somewhere along the line I thought "Hey God! I got my life under control here, you go take care of what you need to." For a while my life was fun, pleasant, maybe not fulfilling (but I was just a kid), but somewhere along the way in life things changed. I started to have problems, depression, anger, etc... I crossed that line of where I had the choice to put down the drink.
Well, at the end of the chapter the share part of a fellows story I really relate to a lot! I remember still thinking "God, I got it under control, it'll get better", it never did. It was only when I tried to take my life, and failed, that I finally became humble and honest with myself. I remember saying "God, I give up! I need your help! I can't even kill myself right, I have nowhere else to go." And there He was. He was always there, I just hadn't been seeking Him, so I never saw Him.
Looking back now, I know I had faith in Him, and He never gave up on me. I had misplaced my faith in people, money, things etc., I even took the brief moments in life to appreciate a sunset, or waves, or birds in the sky, but I had always thought "God's to busy, I can take care of me". Today I don't need a "Reason" for Him to exist, I just know He does. Someone shared that "we breath air into our lungs everyday, don't know how it's made, can't see it, but we know it's there. It's the same thing with God, we can't see Him, don't know how He got here, but He is here." I thought that was a great analogy.
Today, I know that God walks with me everyday (and carries me when I need Him most), he is my conscious companion. I can make choices in my life, good decisions: following his will and applying the 12 steps as solutions to my problems/challenges. Or, I can make bad decisions: following my own self will, not applying the steps, dealing with the consequences of my actions, and finally learning my lesson the hard way. The textbook of Alcoholics Anonymous is a guide to life for me, I apply it to more than just my drink problem. I never feel that hole in my soul anymore, I am comfortable in my own skin, and I enjoy doing new things, because today I know God is with me, and he works through others.
Thanks for listening, have an awesome day!
YamaDogGirl
"But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him."
"When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us!"
Page 57, Chapter 4 - We Agnostics, "Alcoholics Anonymous" 4th ed.
Well, last night at my Big Book discussion we finished Chapter 4 - We Agnostics (starting at pg 54 to 57), and boy was it awesome! I remember being raised with religion in my life, and knowing good from bad, but somewhere along the line I thought "Hey God! I got my life under control here, you go take care of what you need to." For a while my life was fun, pleasant, maybe not fulfilling (but I was just a kid), but somewhere along the way in life things changed. I started to have problems, depression, anger, etc... I crossed that line of where I had the choice to put down the drink.
Well, at the end of the chapter the share part of a fellows story I really relate to a lot! I remember still thinking "God, I got it under control, it'll get better", it never did. It was only when I tried to take my life, and failed, that I finally became humble and honest with myself. I remember saying "God, I give up! I need your help! I can't even kill myself right, I have nowhere else to go." And there He was. He was always there, I just hadn't been seeking Him, so I never saw Him.
Looking back now, I know I had faith in Him, and He never gave up on me. I had misplaced my faith in people, money, things etc., I even took the brief moments in life to appreciate a sunset, or waves, or birds in the sky, but I had always thought "God's to busy, I can take care of me". Today I don't need a "Reason" for Him to exist, I just know He does. Someone shared that "we breath air into our lungs everyday, don't know how it's made, can't see it, but we know it's there. It's the same thing with God, we can't see Him, don't know how He got here, but He is here." I thought that was a great analogy.
Today, I know that God walks with me everyday (and carries me when I need Him most), he is my conscious companion. I can make choices in my life, good decisions: following his will and applying the 12 steps as solutions to my problems/challenges. Or, I can make bad decisions: following my own self will, not applying the steps, dealing with the consequences of my actions, and finally learning my lesson the hard way. The textbook of Alcoholics Anonymous is a guide to life for me, I apply it to more than just my drink problem. I never feel that hole in my soul anymore, I am comfortable in my own skin, and I enjoy doing new things, because today I know God is with me, and he works through others.
Thanks for listening, have an awesome day!
YamaDogGirl
"But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him."
"When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us!"
Page 57, Chapter 4 - We Agnostics, "Alcoholics Anonymous" 4th ed.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
The Dance
A friend of mine, who's not in the program, but has truly inspired me on this new journey of life, sent me a letter today (snail mail). She is who I want to be like when I grow up! She has shown me, by example, how to live life on life's terms, how to laugh through it all, how to be grateful, and how to truly have fun. She sent me this poem, and I'd like to share it with you. Thank you God for putting her in my path, and life.
"The Dance"
Have you ever watched kids, on a Merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain, slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterflies erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't go so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day, on the fly?
When you ask "How are you"? Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done, do you lie in your bed,
with the next hundred chores, running through your head?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child, we'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste, not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch, let good friendship die,
Cause you never had time, to call and say "Hi"?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere, you miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry, and hurry through your day. It is like an unopened gift, thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower.
Hear the music.
Before the song is over.
- Rachel P.
"The Dance"
Have you ever watched kids, on a Merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain, slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterflies erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't go so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day, on the fly?
When you ask "How are you"? Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done, do you lie in your bed,
with the next hundred chores, running through your head?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child, we'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste, not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch, let good friendship die,
Cause you never had time, to call and say "Hi"?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere, you miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry, and hurry through your day. It is like an unopened gift, thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower.
Hear the music.
Before the song is over.
- Rachel P.
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Religion is for people afraid of going to hell, Spirituality is for those who have been there.
A friend of mine in the AA program told me that when I first became sober. It really made sense to me to, for the longest time I didn't need God, I thought, "Don't worry about it big guy, I can handle this, I don't need you." I was playing god, and did a piss poor job at it, every good idea I had ended in failure, misery or trouble. I went to Hell, and came back thanks to a loving God I understand today.
I'm an alcoholic, and by nature I want to run the show completely, I was the master of my own destiny, but I started seeing God working in my life and the lives of others who believed and turned their will over to His care. "When others showed us that God-sufficiency worked for them, we began to feel like those who had insisted the Wrights would never fly." pg. 52-53 of Alcoholics Anonymous. I trusted, that when I turned on a faucet, there would be running water, why couldn't I do the same with God?
So, I started listening and praying to God, and I started seeing Him in everything. I found that the more dependence I have on God, the more free I am. Today, I can see the beautiful forest, instead of that one ugly tree. Today, I can turn my Will over to a God, as I understand Him, and do His will for me.
That doesn't mean I don't take it back once in a while, but today I know when I'm NOT doing His will, because none of my great ideas work. My God saved me, he forgave me, and as long as I continue to honestly seek Him out He will come to me.
"When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or He isn't. What was our choice to be?
I'm an alcoholic, and by nature I want to run the show completely, I was the master of my own destiny, but I started seeing God working in my life and the lives of others who believed and turned their will over to His care. "When others showed us that God-sufficiency worked for them, we began to feel like those who had insisted the Wrights would never fly." pg. 52-53 of Alcoholics Anonymous. I trusted, that when I turned on a faucet, there would be running water, why couldn't I do the same with God?
So, I started listening and praying to God, and I started seeing Him in everything. I found that the more dependence I have on God, the more free I am. Today, I can see the beautiful forest, instead of that one ugly tree. Today, I can turn my Will over to a God, as I understand Him, and do His will for me.
That doesn't mean I don't take it back once in a while, but today I know when I'm NOT doing His will, because none of my great ideas work. My God saved me, he forgave me, and as long as I continue to honestly seek Him out He will come to me.
"When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or He isn't. What was our choice to be?
page 53, We Agnostics, Alcoholics Anonymous
Monday, November 5, 2007
One More Day
Good morning world!
Well things are much better today, and doing the Gratitude List yesterday really helped!
I guess I should explain in a general way what's going on so you understand, and I can see it in writing.
My husband and I have been married for 13 years, we have been through drunks together, sobriety together, and life's ups and downs together. He suffered a back injury around 1999. He has 11 Herniated discs and half of them are ruptured. Obviously, this causes him a lot of pain. But, God has taken care of him, and I'm very thankful for His Grace. He does therapy, sees his doctors regularly, and takes his medication as prescribed. He has good days, and he has bad days, and we take full advantage of the good days together.
There is a reading in the book "A Women's Spirit", a daily meditation book for women. On August 10th, this is the reading:
Life is short; eat dessert first. - Joy Sommers
"Some say that attitude is everything. Many of us have endured abusive families, unreasonable bosses, and the uncertainty of illness. But but not all of us carry the pain and fear of the past into the present. We have found new patterns of thinking and behaving now that we've come to this program for help. Here we cultivate the attitude that we each are doing the best we can with the knowledge we have. We can forgive ourselves for our transgressions.
When we decide to let go of experiences that can't be changed, we find so much more joy in the present. The decision to seek joy and love now is like eating dessert first. The quickening pace of our lives as we age is reason enough to grasp every moment and savor its joy"
– Being more light-hearted today promises me memories worth savoring. –
I always know when I take back the resentment of my husbands condition, because I become sad and angry with him. When I do my gratitude list and read this meditation it reminds me to give it back, and let go. I've learned that the more I depend on my higher power (God), the more free I am.
What started this whole episode of taking it back was his motorcycle trip down south. I was really happy for him when he decided to get the motorcycle, he hadn't ridden in years, and has been riding since childhood. I was concerned about his back, but he said it didn't hurt to ride. So, off he went for 2 weeks, calling me daily, wishing I was with him (it's hard to find sitters for 3 parrots, a lab and a cat), me wishing I was with him, and all the pretty scenery and people he was meeting on the way. He had a great time, I enjoyed the relative quiet at home (pretty noisy with parrots), and things were great. I started to really miss him 2 days before he was to arrive back. At this time his back started hurting him, he would ride for shorter periods and stop to rest. The last day home should have been a 5 hour trip and it took him 11 hours to get here with all his stops for rest. I was concerned but he kept in touch, and finally arrived safely all excited from his trip.
This is when something started nagging at the back of my mind. After he arrived home he was laid up for about a week. The nagging in my brain continued, so I finally I did an inventory on it to try to see it more clearly. I was jealous of the fact he got to go, I was mad at him because he was in pain now and never complained about it on the trip. But as soon as he arrived he was hurting (my selfish mind is telling me that it's me causing him the pain). I was mad because the intimacy (snuggling, cuddling, etc.) in our relationship was strained because of his back, YET he could ride a motorcycle. It has been very hard for us to communicate lately, largely because neither of us are listening to the other. On top of that were both alcoholics and are perceptions are very different.
Now, I learned a long time ago never, ever to work his program, and he never works mine. It don't work, and resentments will fill up faster then drunks getting beer for free at a bar. So how do I approach him, well I asked a couple of women in the program who have dealt with the same situation I'm in now. They shared their experience, strength and hope with me, and told me the solutions that worked for them. So now I am applying this advice, and we are slowly making our way through this together. It's not easy (life isn't always), but we had a good talk yesterday. I guess what made me so sad yesterday was the fact that I do love him very much, and I do want this relationship to work, but I know that only God's Will is gonna prevail, not mine. Hence there's the taking back part, women alcoholics are such control freaks (at least I am). I hope this makes some sort sense, I'm not used to writing a journal, but I thought it would be fun and good for me.
So here is my gratitude list to God for today:
thank you for my sponsee who celebrated 2 yrs yesterday
thank you for Desi, she always brightens my day and is growing by leaps and bounds
thank you for the women friends I have in this program
thank you for the two great leads I heard this weekend
thank you for the sky, the sun, the moon and stars
thank you for the people you put in my life
thank you for taking care of my husband
thank you for forgiving me, even before I do something bad
thank you for my health
thank you for my talent
thank you for my life
thank you for my 3 boisterous parrots
thank you for the new kitty, who has adopted us completely (she leaves presents every morning)
thank you for Belle (doggie), and each day more you grant us with her
thank you for everything...
One last story and I'll shut up for today, but I thought this was funny.
Never do your 5th with your dog!
A gentlemen I heard lead this weekend stated, "Never do your 5th step with your dog", he had decided to do this. One day while with his sponsor in the car, his sponsor asked him how his 4th step was coming, and when he was ready to take his 5th step. The guy replied, "Oh, I already finished my 4th and took the 5th step." Sponsor said great, "Did you go to a Priest?" "No." "Did you go to someone I know?" "Weellllll, yes." " Who was it?" The sponsee tells him it was my dog (name of dog omitted). The sponsor slams on the brakes in the middle of the rode, looks at his sponsee and growls, "Well boy, it's easy to lie to a dog isn't it!" (I have a mental picture of Popeye's Pappy from this line). Needless to say, the sponsee quickly found someone else (human) to do his 5th step with that week.
Take care, have a great day & Bless you all!
YamadogGirl
Well things are much better today, and doing the Gratitude List yesterday really helped!
I guess I should explain in a general way what's going on so you understand, and I can see it in writing.
My husband and I have been married for 13 years, we have been through drunks together, sobriety together, and life's ups and downs together. He suffered a back injury around 1999. He has 11 Herniated discs and half of them are ruptured. Obviously, this causes him a lot of pain. But, God has taken care of him, and I'm very thankful for His Grace. He does therapy, sees his doctors regularly, and takes his medication as prescribed. He has good days, and he has bad days, and we take full advantage of the good days together.
There is a reading in the book "A Women's Spirit", a daily meditation book for women. On August 10th, this is the reading:
Life is short; eat dessert first. - Joy Sommers
"Some say that attitude is everything. Many of us have endured abusive families, unreasonable bosses, and the uncertainty of illness. But but not all of us carry the pain and fear of the past into the present. We have found new patterns of thinking and behaving now that we've come to this program for help. Here we cultivate the attitude that we each are doing the best we can with the knowledge we have. We can forgive ourselves for our transgressions.
When we decide to let go of experiences that can't be changed, we find so much more joy in the present. The decision to seek joy and love now is like eating dessert first. The quickening pace of our lives as we age is reason enough to grasp every moment and savor its joy"
– Being more light-hearted today promises me memories worth savoring. –
I always know when I take back the resentment of my husbands condition, because I become sad and angry with him. When I do my gratitude list and read this meditation it reminds me to give it back, and let go. I've learned that the more I depend on my higher power (God), the more free I am.
What started this whole episode of taking it back was his motorcycle trip down south. I was really happy for him when he decided to get the motorcycle, he hadn't ridden in years, and has been riding since childhood. I was concerned about his back, but he said it didn't hurt to ride. So, off he went for 2 weeks, calling me daily, wishing I was with him (it's hard to find sitters for 3 parrots, a lab and a cat), me wishing I was with him, and all the pretty scenery and people he was meeting on the way. He had a great time, I enjoyed the relative quiet at home (pretty noisy with parrots), and things were great. I started to really miss him 2 days before he was to arrive back. At this time his back started hurting him, he would ride for shorter periods and stop to rest. The last day home should have been a 5 hour trip and it took him 11 hours to get here with all his stops for rest. I was concerned but he kept in touch, and finally arrived safely all excited from his trip.
This is when something started nagging at the back of my mind. After he arrived home he was laid up for about a week. The nagging in my brain continued, so I finally I did an inventory on it to try to see it more clearly. I was jealous of the fact he got to go, I was mad at him because he was in pain now and never complained about it on the trip. But as soon as he arrived he was hurting (my selfish mind is telling me that it's me causing him the pain). I was mad because the intimacy (snuggling, cuddling, etc.) in our relationship was strained because of his back, YET he could ride a motorcycle. It has been very hard for us to communicate lately, largely because neither of us are listening to the other. On top of that were both alcoholics and are perceptions are very different.
Now, I learned a long time ago never, ever to work his program, and he never works mine. It don't work, and resentments will fill up faster then drunks getting beer for free at a bar. So how do I approach him, well I asked a couple of women in the program who have dealt with the same situation I'm in now. They shared their experience, strength and hope with me, and told me the solutions that worked for them. So now I am applying this advice, and we are slowly making our way through this together. It's not easy (life isn't always), but we had a good talk yesterday. I guess what made me so sad yesterday was the fact that I do love him very much, and I do want this relationship to work, but I know that only God's Will is gonna prevail, not mine. Hence there's the taking back part, women alcoholics are such control freaks (at least I am). I hope this makes some sort sense, I'm not used to writing a journal, but I thought it would be fun and good for me.
So here is my gratitude list to God for today:
thank you for my sponsee who celebrated 2 yrs yesterday
thank you for Desi, she always brightens my day and is growing by leaps and bounds
thank you for the women friends I have in this program
thank you for the two great leads I heard this weekend
thank you for the sky, the sun, the moon and stars
thank you for the people you put in my life
thank you for taking care of my husband
thank you for forgiving me, even before I do something bad
thank you for my health
thank you for my talent
thank you for my life
thank you for my 3 boisterous parrots
thank you for the new kitty, who has adopted us completely (she leaves presents every morning)
thank you for Belle (doggie), and each day more you grant us with her
thank you for everything...
One last story and I'll shut up for today, but I thought this was funny.
Never do your 5th with your dog!
A gentlemen I heard lead this weekend stated, "Never do your 5th step with your dog", he had decided to do this. One day while with his sponsor in the car, his sponsor asked him how his 4th step was coming, and when he was ready to take his 5th step. The guy replied, "Oh, I already finished my 4th and took the 5th step." Sponsor said great, "Did you go to a Priest?" "No." "Did you go to someone I know?" "Weellllll, yes." " Who was it?" The sponsee tells him it was my dog (name of dog omitted). The sponsor slams on the brakes in the middle of the rode, looks at his sponsee and growls, "Well boy, it's easy to lie to a dog isn't it!" (I have a mental picture of Popeye's Pappy from this line). Needless to say, the sponsee quickly found someone else (human) to do his 5th step with that week.
Take care, have a great day & Bless you all!
YamadogGirl
Sunday, November 4, 2007
Sad
I haven't felt this sad in a long time. It is a feeling of utter despair. Will it ever leave, when will things change?
What I think is best and what God thinks is best are two different things, I know that. I also know it's not God who's causing this pain, he only wants love and happiness for me. So God, as I try to be patient and listen for your response, I will try to do the next indicated step, and continue to pray.
GOD
thank you for Tretoe, my loving angel
thank you for a roof over my head
thank you for clothing on my back
thank you for my health
thank you for my friends
thank you for my life
thank you for my sobriety
thank you for directing my path
thank you for forgiving me
thank you for being patient
thank you for understanding me
thank you for knowing I'm gonna sin, and still forgiving me
thank you for the seasons
thank you for the life on this earth
thank you for teaching me
thank you for giving me hope
God these are just a few things I'm thankful for today. I know the pain and sadness will pass in your time not mine, I'm sorry I'm impatient (I keep looking for that burning bush), maybe it's inside of me?
What I think is best and what God thinks is best are two different things, I know that. I also know it's not God who's causing this pain, he only wants love and happiness for me. So God, as I try to be patient and listen for your response, I will try to do the next indicated step, and continue to pray.
GOD
thank you for Tretoe, my loving angel
thank you for a roof over my head
thank you for clothing on my back
thank you for my health
thank you for my friends
thank you for my life
thank you for my sobriety
thank you for directing my path
thank you for forgiving me
thank you for being patient
thank you for understanding me
thank you for knowing I'm gonna sin, and still forgiving me
thank you for the seasons
thank you for the life on this earth
thank you for teaching me
thank you for giving me hope
God these are just a few things I'm thankful for today. I know the pain and sadness will pass in your time not mine, I'm sorry I'm impatient (I keep looking for that burning bush), maybe it's inside of me?
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